That One Sick Girl

I cannot think of a time in my life when everything seemed perfect. Actually, things were, and still are, quite chaotic. When I was younger, I didn't know how to properly react to the chaos. I would either erupt in a flood of emotion, or I would shut down completely. Even now, just thinking about some of the things I've been through causes me great distress. It's scary knowing that your whole world could crumble at any moment. When I say this, I don't mean for it to sound as dramatic as it does, but I have a very real fear of falling apart emotionally because I don't know how to handle a situation in a healthy way. I don't deal with change very well, and I live out every day in a constant anxious state because.. well..... people make me anxious. I don't really want to go into much detail right now, but, simply put, I don't always understand appropriate behavior in public and have to work extremely hard to keep my filter on. I'm exhausted. I'